Poor Lyl. Yet more heartache. She tried everything she could think of, risked her life, loved him unconditionally, but still, no matter how much she wanted it to be different than it was, her efforts were fruitless. This is probably my least favorite part of life. Trying to the utmost and it mattering nothing at all. It is a deeper sense of loss, of being robbed, of being worthless, than anything else I know.
And especially when everything you are doing is 100% for the right reason, and to help a child, an innocent. You know you might not be worth saving because you can list your own vices and faults. You can reason out logically why your life is a waste, if you focus on all the bad about you, but in life, you meet some, usually children, who are pure and innocent. You cannot fathom them ever doing wrong, nor that they have ever. You cannot reason out why they must suffer, when all the goodness in the world seems to dwell in their precious hearts.
It is so cruel, and it stays with you for life, when you know someone completely without fault who suffers, and you cannot help them, even though you try; even though you love them.
It just doesn't change anything.
I'll never forget... Max.
My book, my copywrite :)
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