And so in the end, everything she had been searching for had been there, in front of her, the entire time. All the needs fulfilled, all the lack in her complimented, and all her fears consoled. In the end, what she fled from as a girl was only a twisted version of what she yearned for most, made abhorrent all the more because it was so close to her ideal as a woman.
And the most unassuming creature had been waiting to fill her up with everything she was desperate for, in love to the point of obsession. Clarity unveiled the path to bliss, and it was not to be found in royal courts, nor in leading a people. It was a life of contented joy, filled only with love and loving.
I hope you enjoyed the story, my life story, the story of Lyl, but even more, I hope you gained something from it. Thank you.
Lyl has followed the routines responsibility demanded of her, but like myself, and most people I know, when you are pursuing the passions of others, and not of your own heart, it is draining. You can convince yourself it is necessary, good, justified, but in the end all it amounts to is a ball of resentment in the pit of your stomach, and a confrontation for the sake of freedom. There are times when one must put aside their own needs and desires for others, and those times are more often for leaders, but never should they be more than a short while, or the hollowness will eat away at all the purpose you'd once had.
Working like this, one fades in and out, unaware of time, unable to process. Things are done because they must be, but tasks are mindless. Never stay in this place.
Because the moment you get out, that will be the moment that joy returns to your life.
Friends stay friends when they are honest with each other. Even when that honesty is horrible and hard, true friends pull together when things are at their worst, and false friends are only around when things are good, or they want something.
Some people are alright with friends who only need them, who mooch off of them, who trail in the wake of their success, but such people grow wearisome, and over time, drain one dry.
Some people like someone to celebrate with, and would rather hide away alone when they hurt, suffering on their own, not wanting anyone to see them in their moments of weakness. But pride leaves relationships hollow after a while, and one's friends will realize there is no depth to the friendship, or else feel that they are considered untrustworthy and become hurt.
Some people are introverts. I would be considered one myself. I have very few friends, because I do not consider acquaintances friends, nor do I find myself drawn to people in a constant basis. It is actually hard for me to keep friends, because I get distracted, and because it is so very much easier to hibernate in my home alone away from the world.
But everyone needs someone. We are created for community, and thus, I do have a couple people who I am always honest with as much as I possibly can be, and who I try to remember to reach out to once in a while of my own accord. I force myself to be social with them, despite the fact that being around people leaves me tired, simply because I love them, and have real relationships with them, the kind where we would die for each other; would offer our kidney to each other. To me, anything less isn't real friendship, nor worth investing in, but then, I realize that I am probably the black sheep in this regard.
The easiest way, and most common way (in my experience) to create problems in life is by disregard. Not paying attention, being lazy, giving only a partial thought, not noticing- these are the workers of pain, far more often than even machinations of the malicious.
How many abusers were unaware of what they were really doing because they turned their mind off to it? How many people neglected a child and it became dire? Who helps the down-trod by looking the other way or being busy, and yet, who hasn't done it? We justify it, make excuses for it, but the truth is that our lack of caring as a species for each other is what causes the most harm to us all.
Future generations will suffer for our selfishness, just as we did the generations before. Whole races of people, whole species of animals have been wiped out in the name of our comfort, without thinking about their own. We destroy our futures for want in our present. And we blind ourselves to the true nature of procrastination, of mindlessness, because if we actually could see the effects of our own behavior, we would die from the weight of what we do.
We hurt others, those whom we love and strangers alike, by being careless.
If you express your talents and seek to help others, always, they will respond. You don't have to be against people. You don't have to shout your opinions or get red-faced about things that you are opposed to.
Rather, work toward what you wish for, what you want, for others, for the world, for yourself. Pursue things you are for, instead of wasting breath on what you are against, and you will find people you never expected to will unite with your cause eager to help.
Work your gifts. People will be in awe of them. Your talents will bring more peace than your anger. Your positive desires will fuel more happiness for everyone than your rage. Righteous anger might feel justified, but in the end, kindness, and creativity are what makes one an advocate for humanity.
Lyl took a very large risk, and though at first it seemed to be that good fortune was on her side, her daring brought tribulation. She had been willing to suffer to protect her brother, and willing to go, because a friend was with her, but after the exhaustion and the struggle, all there really was left were enemies stilled and a friend near death, with Lyl too tired to do anything useful about either.
Life has moments where the odds are bad no matter which way you choose. Life has times, where protecting one loved one means another is put in harms way. All you can do is try to survive it and find a method to the madness, one which might, just might, bring you and yours out alive. But even if you can, even if luck is with you, there are times in life, no matter how hard you try, no matter how in the right you are, that you and those you love will not come out unscathed.
